Janice Said:

My parents won't let me home school. How can I convince them?

We Answered:

Ontario is beautiful! :-) We covered a great deal of French while we were there, the kids were mesmerized by the all shows on TV in French and the labels on packages and things. We don't do that in the midwest US!

It's great that they're giving you reasons...that means you can actually address them! So my suggestion is to make this a huge research project for yourself, something that would stand out as an example of the kind of quality work you're capable of.

1. Homeschool is quitting school. Of course it is, but it's not quitting education! And there's no stigma of being a drop-out, either, you're still learning, but more on your own terms. That means you're more likely to remember what you learn, instead of cramming for a test and then having it all leak out your ears the next day.

2. No social life. Only if you want. Do THEY have a social life? They haven't been in school for a long time. If they have friends, where on earth did they come from? Graduating from school certainly doesn't doom everyone to a life of isolation forever afterward. Is there something you could do that would appeal to them regarding being social? We join all sorts of stuff...and a friendship based on a common interest is much more long-lasting than one based on geographical convenience.

3. College: Not true:
http://www.ontariohomeschool.org/univers…
Most schools want you to think they hold all the keys to the kingdom (and lots of us believe it!), but they don't.

4. High school diploma. So? And? In all my years, I've never once been asked to produce a high school diploma, even though it's sitting faithfully in a footlocker in my closet. What they have asked for (repeatedly!) is an embossed and notarized transcript from the university I graduated from. I don't think anyone but the college ever bothered to verify if I had graduated from high school; and here in the US, if you say you're a homeschooler and come up with a transcript of the classes you've taken, that's good enough. They're more interested in your ACT/SAT scores, your admissions essay and your letters of recommendation anyway, just like the rest of the students. When I got accepted to college I was surprised that I was surrounded by valedictorians...because I barely squeaked through my miserable public school experience with a C average. (But I got a 32 on the ACT, so I guess that impressed them.) There was also a homeschooler in my class.

5. Not smart enough, but too smart. They may be feeling completely intimidated by this prospect. One thing that a lot of homeschoolers do is enroll in a few community college courses while they're homeschooling. If mom doesn't feel she can keep up with math, they talk to the local math prof at the local college and see if the kid can audit the class (sit in without worrying about a grade). If the kid can prove themselves, they can try to enroll. Many homeschoolers already have an Associate's Degree by the time they're 18 and officially "graduating" from high school. This helps bring down college costs, keeps the kids challenged AND helps with getting into the university of your choice. If you already have a two-year degree, the college will figure you're handling things well, and you can usually just transfer over.

6. $100 textbooks. Sure, if you use textbooks. But do you really want to use those? I've heard of some kids being able to "check out" books out of the local school and use them for the year...sometimes officially, sometimes unofficially. You're not restricted to using textbooks, though. If your mom wanted to learn about how to put together an HTML page, would she seriously head straight to a textbook, or would she start looking through the bookstore, looking online, etc. ?

7. Isolated from the world. Really? Is that possible? On Mondays my daughter had gymnastics, so my son gets dragged along. He made friends with one of the boys there whose sister is also in class, so the two of them play Pokemon or chess or checkers or whatever they want. Tuesdays are Boy Scout meetings, once a month is the Pack meeting, and my daughter has made friends with several of the sisters of Boy Scouts there as well. Tuesday is also Park Day, where the local homeschoolers get together all afternoon to do whatever they want. In good weather, we meet at the park and the little kids play and the teenagers tend to lay out on the grass and talk or play card games. In the winter, we meet at the library, and everyone brings some kind of game to share. Wednesdays we have a kids bowling league for a few hours in the afternoon. Thursday and Friday we end up having Girl Scout meetings twice a month. Once a month on Thursday we have a special Science class at the Science museum, where they use the museum's resources to learn specialized things...we've chiseled rock off of real dinosaur bones, used liquid nitrogen to shrink metal, built a free-standing parabolic arch (only about 8 feet high, though), used robotic arms to perform a series of tasks, programmed Lego Mindstorm robots. All kinds of stuff. Saturdays my son spends all day at Pokemon league...not the way I would choose to spend my free time, but he adores it and his dad is willing to go with him and take him to all the tournaments and such. And when the weather is good, the kids on the block (we have 14 on this block alone, from ages 13 down to 1) are always outside playing after school. My kids hear the school bus and they yell and look out the window because their friends are FINALLY home!! Most of the time they've got someone to play with in the afternoon. I know other homeschoolers who participate in local community theater, who hold down part time jobs, who run their own business, who play in a community band or their own band. There's a lot to do out there! I'm personally prone to volunteering for the humane society and going on biking and kayaking trips for my entertainment.

8. Weirdo Family: Hmmm, so this says to me that they're concerned about appearances, too. So that's going to be a biggie.

Book suggestion: The Teenage Liberation Handbook. Should be in the local library. Soak that thing up and start churning through ideas. It has chapters on getting into college, getting a social life and even convincing the parents.

Look up the laws where you live, make sure you can adhere to the law and propose how you'd do it. Next, find out what you'd be learning in school. Find or make a comparable (or better!!) curriculum. Need to learn calculus? Can you take entry calc at a community college? Look at the Life of Fred textbooks, those are about $30 instead of $100+, and they cover algebra, calculus and trig up through second-year University level.

Find out what resources you have nearby. Do you have museums? Have you considered your government agencies...we have the Department of Natural Resources and the state Department of Conservation, they're always holding one thing or another. What about scouting organizations, do they have a list of places they take the kids to learn things? One of the greatest things I ever went to was an "Educational Resource Fair," aimed at teachers and scout leaders. I got names and numbers of dozens of non-profit educational places, from the art museum to a tiger sanctuary to an organization that caters to advanced math students.

If you're thinking of any particular universities, be sure to check online or call them and find out what it would take for a homeschooled student to get in. Also do a Google search for local homeschool support groups and drop a few emails, make a few calls.

For your parents, I would be very careful to show Here's How to Get Into College, Here's How I Will Maintain a Social Life, and sort of couch it as a free-wheeling, independent study / early college kind of setup, with real-life leadership and experience skills.
"So, what is Jane doing in Science?"
"Oh, she's working with a group to restore the wetlands..."

Lawrence Said:

Insight High School ?

We Answered:

I have no doubt you can do the work, and probably get your diploma ahead of schedule - you're a smart girl! My major concern is that you do learn so much more in classes with other kids and teachers - it is different, and you really need to learn about getting along with people when you don't get to pick whom you're with, or what you're ask to do as a team or a group - you learn team skills and negotiation, and home schooling isn't set up for that.

It's easy to be a free thinker and accomplish great things by yourself, but believe me, if you want to be a nurse, one of the most important things you will ever learn is how to deal with others - there are a lot of politics in medical setting! No matter what you do, there will always be times when you won't be able to avoid people you don't like, and will need the skills to deal with them - or they will get the best of you.

You also need the give and take of other peoples' reactions and emotions, if you intend to be working with patients - and very few nurses don't do that. It's a real skill being in a close relationship with many people at once, some of whom you cannot discard when you want to - it isn't the same as being on the internet with all of us - here you get to pick and choose what you want to see or keep. When you're a nurse, you have to take whomever is assigned to your to your care, until they no longer need you. More often than not, people who are sick or injured are very unhappy, and take it out on the nearest person to them - their nurse. You need the experience with lots of other peoples' emotions - people who are not relatives or friends.

The poiunt would be not whether they look at where you went to hgigh school when you interview for a nursing position - which they would- but whether or not you would survive being a nurse once yuou got a job - and which job you were able to get. It might not be the one at the best hospital, the job you'd love to have. Because anyone worth their salt WOULD take into consideration what life experience you had - and how you conducted yourself with people higher up on the ladder. Don't kid yourself - if you are interviewing at a top hospital, they don't have flunkies doing the interviews.

High school is also a place that you learn to truly express yourself face to face - not just by typing, or speaking into a phone - there is a huge difference, and this is where you will build self confidence. You learn what body language works, and what doesn't, and how it feels to be insulted, embarassed, hurt, loved, valued, and joked around with.

I know that many things can be done with home schooling, but you need the social exposure to many kinds of people in order to learn and grow - high school should be much more than just a series of reading assignements and tests - it should be a full contact sport, where you learn how to act with other humans beings, and carry yourself well.

If you are not sure of yourself, one of the best things you can do is to join the chorus - you don't even need to sing that well, but it's fun, you'll meet a bunch of happy kids, and belong to something bigger than yourself. The other great thing to do is work on the musical theatre production - on or off stage. To work on a large project that has a deadline is a very special experience that everyone should have - many times.

You really need to go to high school - you will learn so much more than what is in books. I would hate for you to miss it, even if not all of it is a little piece of heaven, as it's something you can never get back.

Please go.